While I was on my mad Amazon present shopping spree to get everything ordered and on its way (Amazon is the BOMB and where I buy almost everything with my Prime free shipping account), I struggled to figure out what to get her. I found some great puzzles for people with Alzheimer’s – easier than the ones I’ve gotten her before which are now too hard for her. And I ordered her favorite Russell Stover’s cream chocolates which I have bought for her every Christmas for the last 25 years (she has NOT forgotten that she is a chocoholic).
Most other things that I would have gotten her in the past would not be of need, use or value to her now. So I had a brainstorm – since my stepdad is having trouble getting her dressed and undressed each day (sorry I know this is depressing but it is what it is), what if I could find clothes that would help make it easier? There had to be something out there like robes and nightgowns with velcro fasteners, that kind of thing.
So during my search I came across some items in this general category that made me laugh outloud and then stop myself. Because I felt like a creep for laughing. But I figure at this point most of the time when I’m dealing with my Mom stuff, I’m laughing so that I won’t cry. And I’m telling myself that makes it less creepy. Same as when I make Alzheimer’s jokes about my own memory and it freaks people out and they don’t know what to say. Anyway, just go with me on this.
So here we go, the first item of interest: the Anti-Strip Suit.
Product Description: The Latest, Most Effective Anti-Strip Suit in an innovative fabric that resists tearing like never before. Sewn down collar, embroidery detail. Incredibly long zipper that extends to below the knee for easy assisted dressing. Dome closures at neck helps prevent disrobing. Elasticized waistband and roomy seat for an easy, comfortable fit. Strong polyester-cotton knit. Machine washable.
(Apparently this is so people won’t randomly strip – we’re not to that point yet. But it gave me a hard-core chuckle. And what a great idea for a product. I guess there is a whole industry of clothing like this that I had no idea about. Pretty genius actually. Do they sell these for teenagers?)
Next up: the Fancy Gold Lamé Adult Bib.
Product Description:No danger of ruining your holiday or special event finery with this whisper light GOLD Lamé adult bib. Measures 14.5″ long from bottom of neck, and 13.5″ wide. Velcro closure. MADE IN THE USA!! Fun and glamorous, perfect for home or restaurant. This bib is NOT intended for heavy duty use. CARE NOTE: Bibs may be laundered in cold water and hung dry, but do not attempt to spot clean: If rubbed, the gold will delaminate. Do NOT iron, fabric will melt.
(We are not to this point either but the gold lamé part cracked me up. They had others with leopard, bowties and fake jewelry embroidered on them. They just needed some with a bikini outline like on those corny T-shirts you see in catalogs where it looks like you are wearing a bikini. But then you’d need the anti-strip suit for the rest of the table I guess. Maybe that’s a bad idea.)
At any rate, I found a few items to order. And I’m grateful that I got a chuckle out of some of these items, even though it still feels a little creepy to admit that. But I’m sticking with my story that it’s better to laugh than to cry and that takes the creep factor down a notch.
I’m also grateful that I got quite a few holidayish things done today. I will breathe easier as I lay my head on the pillow tonight. I’m also thankful for you, my readers.
What are you grateful for today? (Even if you have to grasp for it.)